A thing which used to be a table…

Yesterday I managed to frighten my mom really well. It was already evening and I was just about leaving for bed. Mom sent me to give daddy a good-night kiss and off I should have gone.

Unfortunately daddy was just in the middle of some very interesting movie scene and so he said I could wait half a minute. I was not interested in movie at all and so I crawled next to him to the sofa and started moving back and forth over his legs. Suddenly – I myself have no idea how did it happen, I slipped and fell. The trouble was that in my way there was a coffee table. I hit it with my head and than fell to the floor. At the same time there was very loud noise and I felt dizzy. You know, I am not a softling and from time to time I am used to bumping into something with my head… to be honest I keep bumping into furniture all the time. But this was different – much worse. I started crying of course – well I was rather screaming bloody murder – and I am not sure if that was more of pain or of a shock.

Daddy lifted me immediately and mom went to examine every part of my body. There was not a scratch, a bruise or injury visible. She could not believe that because when daddy handed me over mom and I stuck to her like a fly to a flytrap, she started a new row of examination.

Daddy took off the table cloth and mom was shocked once more. I could hear the little drum in her chest “drumming” twice as fast. Daddy too was white in face but did not show out how frightened he was. He just murmured something about totally broken table.

The thing is that the table composed of two “unbreakable” thick tempered-glass desks connected with legs. The upper desk was broken and in the middle there was a part in a triangular shape missing. Its edge was at about the place where my head bumped into it. There were quite many glass cullets around too.

It took some more time to make sure I was not injured at all and did not have any pain. Mom performed one last examination and than I went to bed.

I was so shocked with the whole thing, that I fell asleep even before I started to count my plush sheep.

My first birthday

Finally I am a big boy now. I have already had my first birthday! I can walk now, when I have something to hold to. I am able to feed myself with my own hands and if necessary I can also lift in my stroller and stand there… and of course I can give my parents quite hard time.

The celebration of my first birthday was fine. My grandparents came, mom made me a very good cake and I got many presents. At first I unwrapped a large package, which was from my grandparents. There was a large and colorful box full of cubes. Immediately I imagined great games and how I would throw them all around the floor and back into the box. Than mom and dad helped me to unwrap other package of the same shape. And guess what! There was the same colorful box with the same cubes inside :-). But I didn’t mind, more cubes, better!

I enjoyed the cake too. Before mom recollected I already had both hands full of cream. Very elegantly I took off the cream from the whole half of the cake. I had it everywhere, on my hands, face and I think it was even on my ear. Mommy too enjoyed it as I was sitting on her lap the whole time.

My other grandparents gave me some fancy clothes and a yellow stuffed animal. Well, I am not sure what kind of animal it is – may be a squirrel or some hamster but it has very suitable nose. It is round and hard, very good to chew on it. Sometimes when my favorite zebra is gone, I use this one instead. On the other hand I already got a bit angry with my yellow friend so I put him on a course behind the staircase we have at home. The plushy boy spent whole day sitting there in the corner and praying for somebody to find him there. Finally daddy discovered him and saved him. May be next time I will try to put Ája there and see if she too could hold there for so long :-).

When daddy beat mommy

Easter is really inconsistent holiday. In contrast to Christmas, which is peaceful, full of tasty things and presents, Easter makes event the kindest daddies into wild beasts and mommies, who are usually calm into hysterical women.

At first, I thought Easter would be fine. It all started with baking mazanec (very good Easter bread with raisins and almonds). I did not help to bake it but I definitely help eating it, although they steal my raisins and almonds, it still tastes very good. I can feel as a big boy because they let me eat “adult” food.

About a week ago mommy hung some colorful eggs on our apple tree. At first it looked funny but in a few days slowly leaves started to appear and it all makes our “egg tree” pretty.

Than about three days ago I saw daddy coming from a walk with Ája. He brought home some twigs. The twigs disappeared in the wash room so I stopped taking care. Yesterday daddy took the twigs and braided them into a larger and thicker stick called “pomlazka”. Mommy added some colorful ribbons and than they put it on a table next to a bowl with colorful eggs. Ája walked around and kept taking a sniff. I have to say she is very keen on twigs and wooden sticks of any kind.

Up to this point I would not really mind Easter. But today in the morning something terrible happened. The morning started as usually. Well, not really as usually because I had gone to bed late yesterday so I let my parents sleep late up to almost seven. Than I was ready to get up and we went to have breakfast.

After breakfast mommy cleaned the dishes and than suddenly daddy appeared from somewhere with pomlazka in his hand. He waved it wildly so I could hear the ribbons swishing and daddy screamed something about eggs and feasts. Mom started to yell at him and run, daddy run after her and when he caught her, he beat her. Mom cried some more and Ája was very confused in what to think about it. I too was confused and started to cry. My parents went crazy, poor me!


Daddy stopped beating mom. She conjured up from somewhere one chocolate egg and gave it to daddy for all that hurting. Than she lifted me from my bed and I snuggled into her arms. Daddy still held pomlazka so I didn’t even look at him. When he put it away, he asked me to go to him, but I didn’t dare. I am not the one who talks to brutal people. I clasped on moms arms even harder and hid my head into the ankle of her neck and shoulder. Daddy tried to talk me into going to him, but I didn’t. I held my mom like a tickle till daddy left for a walk with Ája.

Later, I decided daddy was normal again and let him take me for a walk too. We went to my grandparents’ house. Daddy took that pomlazka with us but I found out too late when I had already been fastened to my pram. We came to my grandparents and daddy beat grandma too. He was not so cruel so granny did not cry like my mom. For that he got a bag with sweets and eggs. As I was with my dad, I got my first “koleda” too. One little chocolate bunny and a big banana I am going to have for snack today.

I hope this is the end of Easter. I don’t want to come to any harm like mommy.

Bacilli

Just to make sure you keep being used to read something from me from time to time… :-). Guess what! My daddy was in Russia. He said they had cold like in Russia there. And to not forget Russia he brought one remembrance with him. Some sort of bacillus.

Russian bacillus is much more stubborn and durable than the Czech one, that is clear. It knocked down my dad for more than a week. He coughed a lot, and had runny nose, and didn’t look very well at all. I could tell he was not greedy last Friday. He shared his bacilli with mom and she too got ill. With her eyes swollen, hot forehead and out of voice she handed me to my grandparents. It was just on time because at that time I was till all right while my parents were not. I could still remember how unpleasant feeling it was when I had runny nose and had to take the nose drops. That was a feeling I didn’t want to repeat.

At my grandparents I was enjoying myself very much. I would say it was better than at home. Here my parents put me into my pen to not be able to explore and discover. On the other hand my grandma and grandpa let me go everywhere I want. I can throw my tea behind the sofa, I can pull on everything etc. Sometimes all I have to do is to give my granddad just the look and he takes me, rocks me and talks with me… oh yes, grandparents are fine! Mom and dad too talk and play with me but not all the time :-(

Luckily mom and dad did not die on those terrible Siberian bacilli so on Monday I would ho happily home. I could not stay at my grandparents for too long because my parents would get used to the quiet and peace… well you have to admit, that it would not be the best idea. Welcoming was fun. Ája too was happy I was back home and I was looking forward to playing with her again.

Something has actually changed a little. I am a big boy now. I keep standing at the furniture or fencing of my pen like a king. When you put me on the floor I crawl faster than a panther runs. Ája has troubles to run away from me. I showed her today. Daddy placed a fence before the steps so I would not fall down to the kitchen. Thanks to that mom lets me run around – from living room to the work room and back. Ája was sad because she was behind the fence and we all were here so mom let her in. In just a short while she was whining again. This time she wanted to go away. I kept crawling to catch her, she was running around me like crazy and mom kept telling her to not step on me and to me to not pull on her hairs. What a fun! Daddy did not enjoy it as much as we did. He had to catch the work he had missed when he was ill.

After that mom put me into my pen and we chatted. I was so focused on her telling me about my new teddy bear that I forgot to hold on the fencing. I stood there and watched my mom. Than I fell on my back. Soon I got up again and stood on my own. This time I let go on purpose and lifted my hands above head so mom would see too. In a while I was on my back again.

I got tired of standing up and sitting down in some while but I think I am on a good way. As my aunt Jaruš says, I will probably run away from my first year… :-)

Ten months

I have already celebrated 10 months of life. Such big event can not be overlooked. Part of the celebration is of course also a visit at the doctors. I must know how I grow and gain powers.

Mom and I had an appointment with the doctor on Wednesday. The waiting room was quite all right – warm and not too crowded. At first we saw the nurse who measured me and weighed me. Afterwards we met the doctor. My doctor is very curious. She always asks how I am, what do I do, what can I do, what do I eat, how do I sleep… Than I have to, like a trained monkey, reach for some toy and may be also put it in my mouth. Afterwards I get chilled with stethoscope and have to show my teeth (I already have four of them).

This time I was little cold so in addition the doctor stuck a piece of wood in my mouth. I didn’t like it at all and cried at her. She didn’t care. She turned me on my belly (have to note that I was still naked) and placed some toys in front of me. I grabbed one rattle. Than something funny started to tickle me in my belly. In the morning I drank lot of tee. Suddenly it didn’t only tickle inside my belly and I felt warm on my belly. The doctor’s office got flooded :)

Mummy dried me fast and dressed me so I would not get colder. I even got back my completely dry diaper :). The doctor was smiling saying it didn’t matter. Well, it did matter I think because before we left she advised mom to buy me some nose drops. At first I though I would be fine to sleep without full nose. Well I was wrong – that was real vendetta of the wet doctor!

In the evening, before I drank my last milk, mom protected me totally from any movement. She even involved daddy into the torturing – he held my head. Than I felt water in my nose; I cried and called for help but nobody came to save me. I didn’t get quiet before I had my dinner. I fact I slept much better with my nose empty but the torturing was not worth it.

Trident

Do you know what does trident mean? Trident is that funny fork which Neptune, the lord of oceans, uses to threaten naughty fish. It is also great tool in a mouth. Now I have it too! It is cool. It grew on its own. On the jowl there are 2 teeth and on the upper jaw I have one more. It is much better than can opener.

As soon as mom found out I had it, she started to hide things which I could start opening myself. For example that great rattle, which she made for me from an empty tube of vitamin and a few peas. When she saw it took me only a few seconds to open the lid of the tube she was afraid I would make her count the peas like Cinderella had to so the toy was gone. I also lost my favorite blow-up red ball, which hole for blowing up was secured with white tap. I haven’t managed to take the tap down yet but mom saw my friend Ben how skillful he was. Ben visited me not that long ago with his mommy Shelley. He is a nice boy, he brought many nice toys with him and –the most important, he already has four teeth and showed me how to use it.

The teeth grow on their own but I make progress also on other fields. I keep practicing standing in my pen. I am still not strong enough to keep the balance and stand without holding on something but sometimes I can use only one hand to hold myself. I also found out when I stand by the pen fence, leaning on it with my belly. It has one big advantage. It makes my hand free so I can use it for something else – to throw the toys out of the pen or to play. My mom and I we play that nice game – I call it “who stands more” and to be honest mom is loosing so far. I lean with my belly on the fence, start crying – big tears falling down my face – and wait for mommy. If she does not seem she would like to take me out of the pen and hold me, I use heavy armor. I reach my hands for her. Usually it is enough to make her take me with her.

When I learned to crawl, I had no idea how useful this is going to be. I realized that at the moment when I got out of my pen. Especially at “autnee” Ivana. She has very nice and also large living room with many interesting corners, where you can go to, lamps with pretty cables to pull on, glittering knockers on the drawers you can keep bumping with, fringe on the carpet to chew on… simply paradise.

I also like to explore at my grandma and grandpa. Their most interesting room is the kitchen. Right opposite the door of the living room, where I usually camp, there is the waste basket. That must have veeeeeeery interesting content because I am not allowed to even touch it. On the floor there is linoleum so it is nicely slippery. That is much better than the carpet from which I have my knees calloused.

At home I don’t really enjoy myself much. I spend most of the time in my pen 1.5 to 1.5 meters, which is in the living room or in my second bed which is in the kitchen. The bed has very high fencing so when I stand up, I just manage to rub my itching jaw on the top lath. They say the floor in the kitchen is too cold and therefore I cannot crawl there. In living room there are many cables and electric plugs so I cannot crawl unattended there either. The only plug within my reach is the one in my daddy’s work room. He lets me crawl there sometimes. The plug is secured with some piece of plastics so I cannot get to the two interesting little holes which are behind it. I am also attracted with all the cables, which are under my daddy’s table. Those were unfortunately hidden behind large pillows. Poor me! Because of these protections I must keep practicing my standing and walking. I hope to be faster and more lithe and therefore to be able to get over all the border and limits!

Sort of different dimension

My life got a new dimension. Not that long ago I rather lived in 2D space. I lay in bed or in the pen on my belly or back and I could play only with the toys I could reach.
Where there was no other way out, I just simply crawled to get the toy myself.

This week my life changed. Now I know how Newton felt when the apple hit his head. He discovered whole new world. I started to discover slowly. Mom was just placing something to the cupboard kneeling on the floor. I caught the edge of my bed, lifted myself and suddenly I was standing on my knees too. The weeks of developing my muscles on my arms, back and belly paid off in this one single moment and suddenly I was kneeling and – that was real surprise – looking down at her.

Mom turned back and was shocked. I guess she definitely did not expect me to look directly into her eyes. She run for the camera as daddy was not at home. I managed to keep kneeling so she had chance to take enough pictures and than I fell down like a pear.

That is not all. Next day I hung on the fence of my pen. Than my leg slid and I sat down on my other leg. I was surprised to find out that this was not going to be such a problem. I rolled on my belly, climbed back on my knees and sat down again. Awesome! My range changes completely when I am sitting. I have two free hands to play. It is as if toys are jumping into my arms themselves :-).

World is sort of different when you look at it from vertical direction. Of course this is not completely new for me because mom and daddy already kept me that way so I could have had good look at everything from the top. But I could not use my hands. So different now! I can crawl everywhere I need unless I am limited with some fence. I can also sit myself without any support so I have much more space to play. And, if there is something around I cold support myself I am also able to kneel. I just need one hand to help myself… so when I try hard, I can even tiptoe for a few seconds. I think good times are coming…

Very busy

The New Year has just begun and I have already been involved in work procedure. Mom and I went to her office in the morning. I lay down on a blanket and kept banging with my rattle to the floor. Mom meanwhile talked to her boss and took some notes. It lasted quite long and as those two talked about uninteresting things I was bored.

Soon I realized that this way it was going to take us hours to get home so I decided to put myself to work. I started with the cables. Every proper office should have cables correctly installed, accessible, and hidden at the same time so nobody would tumble over it. I had to admit that this was not a case of the office where we worked with my mom.

I started to crawl towards the table. Already from the distance I could see the first cable. I got to it and at first I pulled it down but the cable didn’t move. Mom’s boss smiled at me encouragingly so I continued. The cable led under the table so I crawled that way. I got up to the socket where the cable ended. Before mom managed to catch me, I started to pull on other cables. Most of them ended in a computer. Cables were tangled, dusty, and one or two of them were even not plugged in at all. You should see the mess! It was just on time some handy guy –just like me – did something about it.

Mom soon realized that unlike in China here in the Czech Republic children’s work was strictly forbidden. That must be the reason for her not letting me finish my job on cabling.

In a short while we left for home. It is a pity I didn’t manage to re-cable the office. May be next time. I will have to change my clothes for this work. Mom was not happy seeing me after the work I performed – she said I looked like a little pig and that she would have to put me into the washing-machine. I hope Ježíšek will come again soon. I will write him to bring me some overalls :-).

My first Christmas

Finally I know why do they sing “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas…“ Unfortunately you can only dream of such Christmas. When you look out of the window you can see just very light dusting on the grass. It looks like trying to cover little bit darker top of Christmas bread with powder sugar, which you have just run out of.

On the Christmas day there was completely no snow. I can tell because we went for a walk to see grandma and grandpa. When we got home, everybody was in good mood. I had a little nap in my stroller to gain powers for evening. Just my parents looked a little frozen.

In the evening we all dressed up, Ája wore a ribbon around her neck and daddy took a new fresh shirt. During the dinner I sat with my parents by the dinning table and kept banging with my rattle keeping the rhythm of Christmas carols.

After dinner we moved to the living room. There is a pretty Christmas tree in the corner with many beautifully glittering decorations. Unfortunately I was not allowed to either touch or taste any of them :-(. I could not even touch any of the lights daddy turned on.

I think Ježíšek (Jesus Child) had to arrive with the presents when parents were having dinner. Before dinner the Christmas tree was standing lonely and alone. When we came after dinner there were many boxes and presents under the Christmas tree decorated with nice wrapping paper and ribbons. I was interested mainly in the ribbons so when mom placed me on the floor I headed directly to the first present and started to unpack it. Mom and daddy had to help me as it was not as easy as I had hoped. The result though surprised me pleasantly. There were a few plastics rings suitable for beslavering and throwing on Ája.

Ája also got some presents. Her the most favorite was the one from which she pulled out a yummy salami stick. She didn’t pay attention to the wrapping paper, which I on the other hand liked a lot. I patiently mumbled it and kept tearing it for so long that at the end there was just a bulk of paper. Before my parents opened all presents I managed to tear some more paper and ribbons.

I got to bed with my tummy full and pleasantly tired. My wardrobe and toy box enlarged and Ája keeps visiting the drawer with her treats much more often than before. I like Christmas.

Little artist

Recently I have been remiss in my duties to the blog. I am afraid it is all because of Christmas coming soon. My mom and I are having quite a lot to do. Mommy keeps running around with a piece of cloth in her hand cleaning or spreading flour all around floor in kitchen. Sometimes she also throws the already baked Christmas cookies on the floor.

Poor Ája wants to help so she tried to eat the cookies - just in case somebody stepped on it and made more mess. But mommy does not sympathize with her and picks the cookies up. May be she wants to have more ammunition for next time to throw on Ája.

Besides cleaning and baking there are many other positive sides of Christmas. One of them is the light. Daddy placed small lights on the trees behind the house and my parents take me from time to time to the window so I could have a look. That is fine. I can also amuse myself with pulling on the curtains.

In the living room we have advent wreath with four candles. I like the candles burning. So does Ája so she walks around waving her tail to support the flames with some air. I just keep waiting for her tail to get on fire too…

I have been diligent before Christmas too. I keep practicing to be able to crawl for my presents under the Christmas tree (I suppose there will be tons of them as I am terribly good baby) myself. So far I manage to crawl on my knees and hands just a little and than I fell on my belly and move ahead just using my hands and arms.


Therefore I also keep developing my muscles on my arms. One of my favorite activities is to scratch on the wall behind my bed in kitchen. It sound well but my parents don’t sympathize with my musical talent and keep pulling my bed away from the wall. Today I made up one improvement. I found my dummy under one of the teddies. At first I stuck it into my mouth as usually but than it crossed my mind that I could use it as a prolonged hand. The dummy sounded wonderful and it also helped me to get among painters. Mommy found out soon and took the dummy away but I am quite curious what will daddy say to the pretty, cubist line I drew on the wall with my dummy :-)

My first tooth

Today I grew my first tooth. Finally! Recently I had been having some strange feelings in my mouth, saliva pouring… The only thing that helped from the unpleasant feeling was to rub the gums on different toys, sticks fencing the bed, hands – my own as well as of my parents, blanket and other similar accessories. Once I saw my parents carefully cleaning their hands it was clear that they were going to stick their fingers into my mouth.

This morning I was doing the regular morning hygiene with my mom when she saw a spot on my lower gum. She immediately went to clean her hands and there we go – I had her fingers in my mouth. In a minute she touched the little bulge, which I had been rubbing my tongue already for a few hours.

When daddy came for a snack, mom announced him the news. He immediately went to clean his hands and there we go – I had his fingers in my mouth. And again I could hear agreeing nodding. I hope this will come with every new tooth. I think there should be nineteen more coming :-).

A strange woman

A few days ago my mom disappeared. At one moment she was there, giving me my snack. Than granny and granddad came, short while after that my dad came home and than suddenly mom was not there. I didn’t even register her leaving.

I was at home with my grandparents, sometimes daddy came to say hello or Ája put her nose into my bed. It was OK. In three days I moved with my grandparents to their home. I didn’t sleep in my bed, I got different blanket to play on… I could play with other toys.

And as soon as I finally got used to it, there was another change. I was lying on the blanket on the floor, sucking on an ear of my toy giraffe. My gum keeps itching and the ear is a good help. And than my daddy came with some strange woman. Immediately I started crying – well I am not ashamed to admit I was crying like a little baby :). I was crying so heartbreakingly that granny had to take me to her arms to quiet me. It calmed me down a little but as soon as the strange woman came closer, I started to cry like a crocodile again.

It took me at least half an hour to accept the information that the strange woman is my mom so I stopped crying. I still watched her suspiciously but I let her hold me in her arms. And than it was all clear! She was really my mom – surely she was – she smelled good like my mom and she also had such smooth hair – suitable for pulling – just like my mom :)

And of course I was right!

So as usually I was right, when I felt uncomfortable about today lunch. Mom did not forget. I have to admit, she tried hard but the result was the same – completely spoiled lunch.

Already before lunch mom had some sneaky smile on her face when she was cutting some orange stick to small pieces. Than she put it into a pot and added a few drops from a tall square glass. I expected, and I was right, that she had again been preparing my “lunch”. When mom was my curious looks, she explained that she was cooking carrot with a drop of olive oil, which is important to release vitamins from the carrot. I hope I won’t be overmuch healthy :(

Recently mom has been in trouble with time so I had to watch the cover dancing on the small pot alone from my bed. It took some time till I could smell something strange. In one more minute my lunch started to send some smoke signals to the surroundings. That woke my mom’s attention too and she stopped running around the dinning room where she had been cleaning and went to save my lunch.

Mom had to ventilate kitchen properly, as the smoke signals were quite strong.

Daddy was laughing a lot. He explained that this had already been sort of tradition here. Mom always burns meal when she cooks or bakes something for the first time. My daddy loves cinnamon cookies. When mom baked them for the first time, she burned them properly so daddy managed to eat only one or two pieces and the rest had to be thrown away. It took mom whole year till she made herself to bake the cookies again.

This gave me some hope. May be it meant the end of the experiments with my lunch. But the hope disappeared soon. I found out that mom had whole package of carrot in the fridge. This seems I can expect very “happy” childhood :(.

Maryša, where did you buy the mash?

There it is. The fight has just started – fight for my dear life. My own mother decided to poison me.

It all started quite innocently. I was placed into my seat as usually at lunch time and was looking forward to the upcoming rice mash with banana flavor. I got used to sweet banana taste very fast, although at the beginning I pretended I was not very keen about it. That is just because I was expected to act like that.

So I was in my seat and not expecting anything wrong I opened my mouth. And just after that the hard fight started. In a second I could feel something very strange in my mouth. It was orange and did not taste like my favorite mash at all. There were some very strange pieces on my tongue. Before I could do anything there was new portion of this disgusting stuff. Than I realized mom planned it all already yesterday. She gave me before lunch about three spoons of some orange liquid with some trace rests of milk flavor. I was not very keen about it but I still sort of ate it to make her happy.

Before mom managed to stick the second spoon of the orange stuff into my mouth I started to choke the first one out. The next moment the orange mash was everywhere. I guess mom didn’t need to clean the floor yesterday so carefully.

Than she tried to mix little bit of this orange thing in my rice mash. It completely damaged the taste of the mash and it could not cover the orange stuff. Grrr… slowly and carefully I poke it all from my mouth with my tongue and spitted it all around me. Ája, who kept watching under my chair hoping for something GOOD to eat jumped and run away with orange hair on her back. Mom tried to squeeze from the stuff she called “good carrot, just take a bite” at least some juice and mix it again into my mash. Well, she couldn’t bluff me. She could not make me to eat it - not even when she promised that if I ate the carrot, I would be healthy and would not have to wear 4 eyes as my daddy does.

The end of the match was sad. I ate just the bites containing my mash – and I was very careful doing so. Mom tried to sneak in my mouth sometimes little carrot but I always found out and kept spitting it back. The result was quite good- dirty dog, I got my clothes changed and I think mom is going to change her t-shirt too. She maybe also has some carrot in her hair. I don’t, but that is only because I don’t have any hair.

Mom was knocked down completely. I have beaten her and the carrot one to nil. Now I am just terrified what will come tomorrow.

A journey to Hell

I have already visited Hell. This Hell is unusual, there are many devils living in one cottage, but I think nobody is really afraid of them.

This Hell can be found near town Nové Město nad Metují and we decided to make a trip with my grandparents, parents and Ája of course. We left our car near a small bridge by the river Metuje, which is about 4 km far from Hell and from there we walked (well some of us were actually driven :-)) to Hell. Trees around already changed their coats into Autumn and so we saw many different colors on them. Metuje, which does not have much water there went on very slowly past high cliffs and only rarely speeded a little and made some whirlpools.

Ája was very happy. She kept jumping into water and she didn’t care at all that the water was very cold and sometimes she had no place to climb back to the bank. When she got back to the path, her hair was like a hay-stack.

In the middle of our journey we saw some ducks on the river. The birds were enjoying nice weather and calm water but only by the moment when Ája saw them too. She jumped into water and run directly to them. Her hunting instinct woke up, water splashing everywhere and suddenly the ducks took off. Ája accelerated immediately too trying to catch them. Unfortunately she still cannot fly so the ducks soon disappeared. Only after this Ája realized that she was a retriever and retrievers were supposed to bring hunted birds to the hunter and not to hunt them alive.

When we arrived to the village Peklo (= the Hell), it was lunch time so we all had something to eat. Just the poor dog didn’t get anything. The dogs were not allowed into the restaurant so she had to stay outside. Daddy spent most of the time there with her as she would be able to leave with some strangers.

The restaurant in Hell is a bit strange. It is full of devils, demons and satans. The only thing which is not like in Hell is, that it was not very warm inside. I was OK, as mommy wrapped me in my sleeping bag but others had to wear their coats. The waiter too looked like some devil. I could not see if he had a hoof but his behavior was very devil like.

After lunch we set off back round the river. Daddy tried to talk Ája into not jumping into water so her hair would dry. She seemed to get it but as soon as mom and dad didn’t pay attention, she jumped into water again. Well, we arrived home well, I was relaxed, my parents and grandparents a little tired and Ája… Ája was very wet :-)

Little black balls

Indian summer came on Friday. Unfortunately it disappeared on Sunday but still we really enjoyed the two pretty days. Mom and I went to the grandparents’ garden to pick up some rowan and to catch some sun light.

On Friday we went alone. As we went by car, I could spend the time sitting in my removable car seat on the loan. I was looking around through the small meshes of the mosquito net and kept happily “singing”. From time to time a wasp tried to get under my net but without success. My protection shutter was perfect. The black-yellow fighters had to leave. They probably went back to look for some forgotten plums, which could hide somewhere behind flowers in the flower beds.

Mommy diligently picked the little black balls of rowan. She was standing on old unstable stepladder and kept putting the balls to a small bucket underneath. Sometimes I could hear the balls running on rubber pavements between flower beds because mom didn’t always send the balls to bucket. Soon her hands were all red from the juice and her hair was all slatternly from the branches and wind.

The sky was beautifully blue, just the wind blew with strong breath. It reminded me of a kids poem “Blow, blow the wind…” and than, suddenly, the wind did really blow and almost did put down a little pear like in that poem… actually - no, not a pear because there are no pears on the garden…but my mom. Mom caught on the tree and was swaying in the rhythm of the wind. Luckily both my mom and the tree survived, the stepladder did not break and mom did not break any arm or hand either. We left for home with three buckets of rowan, some tomatoes and flowers. In the evening mom made cider from the juice of rowan and the will also make liqueur from the juice.

On Saturday we went to the garden again. This time I was in my pram and mom kept pushing me. We also took Aja with us and sometimes it looked like she was walking alone without us. When mom called on her she did as if she did not hear. Aja does this from time to time but usually it ends with her being belted on the leash again and having some wind in her fur. After this she usually does not talk to my parents for the whole afternoon.

Just before the last hill we met my granny. She was cycling to the garden too. There was some rowan left and it had to be picked before the birds would do it. Mom parked my so I could watch her and granny and than she took the stepladder again. Aja helped a lot. She kept walking around and picking the balls which fell on the ground.

Than, Aja got tired of looking for the missed balls of rowan and she went around the garden to have a look at the flowers and I guess she also met some wasps. Than she found out there was a whole bucked of rowan on the grass. Why to pick sole balls when you have the whole serving prepared in from of you… But mom saw her and she retrieved the bucked and hid it. Poor dog! Aja tried to find the bucket again and than she lied down next to my pram and she was probably digesting the vitamin C she ate.

We all came home tired but happy and relaxed. The sun makes miracles.

When I grow up

When I grow up, I would like to be a workman. I would work for medium size construction company, which builds isolation on small houses and I would have a perfect life like in clover.

Well, such workman has to wake up early in the morning to be on spot at six a.m. but the supervisors are kind at work so he always gets a few first days to get used to it and those days he starts work much later. Anyway I don’t mind getting up very early (unlike my mom who has quite troubles to keep up with me :).

When I come to work I will always have a cup of coffee to wake up properly. Some little work in the morning always heats one up but you have to be careful so I will also take lots of brakes. I will take at least two snack breaks and one or two more breaks to have some more coffee… well and of course there is also the lunch pause. Another thing I have to think over is smoking because if I start smoking I will get at least three more breaks to smoke. It is surprising how fast the day runs. I will work from six a.m. to four p.m. and I will go home at around three and on Fridays I will leave earlier – lets say at two – to enjoy my family, you know…

What I for sure don’t want to be is a programmer. I can see it at home. My dad gets up also very early to be by the computer at six a.m. But he never takes a cup of coffee before work. He takes some snack only when mom brings it to him and he eats it while working. He takes only very short time for lunch pause and than he keeps working by late afternoon. You can hear him clapping on the keyboard or talking on the phone. Sometimes he also leaves home for some meetings but that is even worse. I am surprised he still remembers he also has Aja, mom and me and that he still finds some time to walk Aja or to help mom with shopping bags.

No no … I will definitely join the great group of workpeople…

How we had our facade isolation made

There is lots of movement at home again. On Mondays a big new action started. A group of four men came with lots of tools and tubes wooden boards. The motto is “Demolish and destroy!” At first the chief told my mom that they would work from early morning to late night (i.e. from six a.m. to four p.m.) but the reality is a little different. The first day the boss arrived at around eight and the rest of the group was even later. I don’t know exactly when because at that time I was in the tax office with my parents (I have already written about it before – my second story with blackmailers). At two p.m. they were gone again. Next day they came an hour earlier so they are getting better :-).

The workmen started to work with the tubes and wooden boards. They made scaffolding. It all had to be very heavy because they had to finish it next day. My dad could not look at it and left for St. Petersburg. No wonder, the workmen started to make terrible noise when demolishing the old facade.

They have been demolishing it for third day already. They keep taking down the old asbestos facade, siding and wooden boards. The strokes are so loud that they woke me up several times and two or three times I was even afraid they ploughed inside. Luckily the house is still standing all right. It just looks very sad – it is like naked.

Aja also does not really like the works. She tries to sleep a lot but sometimes she startles, jumps and starts barking. Oh yes, Aja also know how to bark! Unfortunately she sometimes also barks at night. She probably does not like the scaffolding around the house. One night she even stressed mom so much that she took a fire-hook and went around to check the house. As Aja had already waked her up at least twice before, mom kept walking around with big dark sacks under her eyes the next day.

Already the first day mom let the workers know very clearly that the job at our house won’t be so easy. One of them smoked at ten when they were taking the first coffee break (first of many). Mom saw it so she gave him an old tea cup she usually gives to the smoking visitors instead of ashtray. The others were laughing at the smoker saying it was cleaver of my mom to do it as he would otherwise keep throwing the fag-ends around the garden. I am quite curious how many of those fag-ends is mom going to find when they are finished because they left the cup in the back garden but started to work mainly in the front.

I am also a little worried that when I start walking I won’t have any place to play. My parents got me a small but very nice garden where you can run around the grass, crawl into the flower beds and jump on the sandpit. Well… you could. Now there are old boards everywhere, huge bags with waste, tools and dust. It looks here like on a battle field, the grass is beaten down, there are nails dropped into the flower bed and the sandpit is gone. Aja is unhappy that she doesn’t even have a little space where to go and mom cannot look at the havoc any more. Daddy will be shocked when she is back. I wish it was all over soon!

Blackmailers all around

And there it is again. Do you remember one of my last stories about the blackmailers? Finally I started to feel safer regarding my toys as it seemed all problems were solved. My dad even received a letter from the lawyer confirming that the whole thing was a mistake.

The feeling of the safety was gone very soon. There was another blackmailer letter delivered. This time the envelop with a red strip was delivered to my grandparents. It was addressed to my mom and it again threatening with execution. The blackmailer was not the Czech Tv again but this time it was the tax office.

My grandmother felt very nervous. She said that she would never expect such threat because of my mom. She scanned the letter and sent it to mommy so she would have something to think about over the weekend.

And that is what she did. She kept thinking about it whole weekend. On Monday we all went for a walk to the tax office. Mom, daddy and I took a few rides in an elevator, visited a few offices and spent at least an hour with the woman who had sent the terrible letter. Finally everything was explained and the blackmailer woman did admit that the letter was a mistake and that there is really no debt on my mother’s account. Another twenty minutes my parents spent arguing with her asking for some written confirmation. The lady thought she had it on the hook and that she wouldn’t for sure give any confirmation. But she was no match for my father. He silenced her idle talk about no confirmation with a calm face of Charles Bronson as given by law my parents had a right for something called “Oral Proceeding Record”. Finally we left for home with this record in my mom’s bag. The record said literally that the tax office requested the money based on false claim and that my mom does not owe anything to them. The controller lady must have sleeping problems now and I guess from time to time she keeps hearing harmonica in her nightmares… :-)

We arrived home at the last moment – just on time to give me something to eat. I started to announce the hunger already on the way.

Than daddy just took his two bags, waved us and he was gone. Luckily at leas my mom stayed with me.

Television – my good friend

My parents are usually quite fain and they for sure love me but sometimes I cannot understand them at all. For example yesterday. Mom was feeding me my afternoon snack and she turned the TV on to watch some news. We have a new box under the Tv set – my parents call it satellite – and unlike the old one this box allows us to watch also more Czech programs like ČT24 etc.

So mom watched the news on ČT24 and she held me to not be able to watch it too. I don’t understand why can’t I enjoy the movable pictures when she can watch it.

I tried to wrick my neck, I was not interested in the bottle any more, and I was kicking my mom for so long that I really managed to take a glimpse of the box with movable pictures. Unfortunately my mom is quite sensitive and she understood what I was up to very soon. She simply switched the TV off. Instead of both being satisfied we both didn’t watch.

We have already had the similar fight with my daddy. Colorful Olympics circles, lots of musclemen and musclewomen who looked like the men, music, shouts and other noises … that all was on TV and daddy was watching it. Mom was running around with iron and was working on my clean wear. I was lying therefore on my daddy’s lap trying to suck on my fingers. Daddy is even worse than my mom. He also doesn’t let me suck on my fingers and he even hides my hands so not to be able to put it into my mouth. In a while I got bored with the fight and than I realized why I was lying with my back towards the TV. The TV was on and I was going to miss the fun.

So the new fight started. At first I kept turning but daddy realized what I was about to do. Than I tried to change my strategy. I behaved as if I was interested in a toy and as soon as daddy started giving it to me, I turned. It is not easy but I made it. And what do you think daddy did? Of course he turned me back in a way I really had no chance to watch the TV. Luckily my neck is still very flexible. I almost wringed off my head but I could see. Well, just for a while. Daddy turned me back again and when he saw I was not giving up, he simply took to another room. Such a life! :(